The act of forgiveness isn’t in forgetting past hurts, but in overcoming them.

Pain tends to leave an indelible mark on the heart… we can learn to bypass the scar, but it’ll always be around. I know that I’ve meted out my share of pain to people that were at some point in my life very dear to me, and I can only hope and pray that this grace be given to me too. I cannot expect however… I can only hope.

Forgiveness requires two things: a sincere and heartfelt recitation of contrition and apology, and time. Especially time. I’ve found that it takes me a long time in order to truly process the hurt and find myself in the right state to forgive someone. I take it to be similar with everyone else, excepting that the time factor varies from person to person. For some it takes an instant… for others, almost a full lifetime.

No, I can’t always excuse my own examples of less than ideal behavior… there are things that I have done that are worthy of a good old-fashioned cuss out by the wronged party… there are things I regret saying… there are things I regret doing… but I’d like to think that from those past misdeeds I’ve grown up, learned from my own mistakes and moved onward and upward. I can only hope that whoever I’ve wronged will give me the benefit of the doubt.

And if forgiveness never comes, that’s fine too.

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